standingonmyowntwofeet

A Journey from Victim to Survivor…to Living Freely

Hamilton

on October 27, 2016

I’ve blogged before about the role of lyrics in my life…the soundtrack in my heart and mind…words that have allowed me to survive, to live…and, to live freely…lyrical wisdom is a go-to that keeps me from harming, a distraction from the bites I have to take to nourish my mind  and body, and in recent weeks-it’s allowed me a reprieve from ptsd symptoms.  In has walked Lin-Manuel Miranda’s Hamilton the Musical…with its hip-hop, rap, jazz, Broadway (and more) genre mix, I quite simply was thrown into it.  It takes my “distract” skill and multiplies it by a million.  I cannot not move, rap, sing along from the opening to closing beats and notes.  When hypervigilance and flashbacks and nightmares were ruling my days and nights, and as weariness washed over me, I needed something…and, in walked “AL-EX-AND-ER–We are meant to be.”

In giving a speech last week, I had to consistently remind myself NOT to fall into repositioning my speech as a Hamilton musical number!  I did do my car performances on my way to and from, however.

I’m quite certain that Lin-Manuel Miranda didn’t write this to save someone in the throws of ptsd or an eating disorder or self-harm or anxiety or depression (etc., etc., etc.)…and, it’s surely helping me to change maladaptive thoughts from becoming maladaptive behaviors, to be that split second I need to choose recovery…and, I’m so grateful…because I needed something.  And, I’m thrilled to add it to my toolbox.

 

 

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