A Journey from Victim to Survivor…to Living Freely


on November 23, 2012

I’m tired.  I decided to stay in tonight to take care of me. Sitting down to watch a movie sounded like fun.  I am not a TV watcher and rarely go to the movie theater.  I settled on Crazy, Stupid, Love.  I am a big fan of “Michael Scott”…then there was a sex scene….it wasn’t violent, it wasn’t rape….it is triggering me.  So, I sit here and think that blogging will help my hands to stop shaking….and work through the next right things to let myself remember and not judge that I am triggered…and I wonder what more can come to the surface and at what point I’ll have discovered all the triggers….this past week, it was someone walking by who wore the same cologne…it immediately sent me spiraling.  I still don’t know the name of it and wouldn’t have been able to tell you that he was even wearing cologne that night…my brain remembered.  My brain remembers it all.  And apparently has been storing things until I was safe enough to process them.


3 responses to “Triggered

  1. With you…stay grounded. It’ll pass. Have you tried EMDR? It’s been a miracle processor for me when stuff erupted and overwhelmed me. Feel free to email me. I only got one from you. Hope I didn’t miss any others. Hugs.

    • I am okay …. and it’s okay to be okay. My children are with their dad for the weekend, so I am being lazy today…very much not like me…although, I realize in typing that, I’ve done online shopping, am planning to get the kitchen measured for new cabinets, thinking of going for a run….my pastor has told me I need to work on being a little more “Half-assed”. My interpretation of ‘lazy’ isn’t quite what others consider! That Type A world is still part of me 🙂

  2. Thank you…..letting it come…going to shower…haven’t done EMDR but have heard great things. Thank you for responding. It surprises me…I know that’s how it works, but it shocks me that it comes up like this…

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